It's not about it making sense it's about it feeling right.
The most important relationship you have is the relationship with yourself - because when you get that right all the other relationships begin to work.
Some people think of what I do as hypnosis and I am a trained Ericksonian Hypnotherapist but like one of my teachers and mentors Stephen Gilligan I don’t like the word: “Hypnosis”. Most people think of it in a profoundly disempowering way - that it’s something that gets done to you. When the reality is hypnosis is about hypnotic suggestions - there is no such thing as hypnotic commands. Though many people keep themselves disempowered by believing that there are. It’s the mistaken belief that you have to do what you're told rather than think for yourself that keep people trapped in downward spirals where things keep getting worse.
- That you have to do what your parents told you, even though you are no longer a child.
- That you have to be the person that fits in with your friends and peer group even though you dream of being so much more.
- That your work constrains you and keeps you in a prison that is going nowhere.
This is the common hypnosis that many people suffer from. The hypnosis of living a life that you don’t want to be living. You don’t want to be more asleep, you want to wake up to the possibilities that excite you and make that your everyday reality rather than someone who just does that at weekends and holidays.
You can learn to stop living for the weekends and learn to access your power and creativity because when you have access to this you can learn to do what I call: “Living Life For Play.™”
This is when you remember and reintegrate your sexual power and playfulness - that literally charges you up like a good Tai Chi or Chi Kung workout. And it’s this internal work, what the Chinese martial artists call Nei Kung that makes the difference… So there are many names from traditional cultures for this work,
I’ve just started from a Chinese tradition in starting to explain the work I do. But in a Shamanic context, I’m trained in a Hawaiian lineage (Huna Mua) but I prefer to express what I do without labels - though I do enjoy and have used the phrase: “Naked Shamanism”.
In Shamanism it’s about recovering parts you’ve lost. But my thinking is not around doing the work for you which was traditionally the Shamans role - I believe in todays world more people need to take on the role of Shaman for themselves.
So in the same way it is disempowering for someone to do hypnosis to you, it is disempowering for someone to be a shaman for you when you both could and should do that for yourself.
And there’s also a lot of research that shows when you take control for yourself, whether that is of your own life or even just what you want that’s when the magic starts to happen.
Joseph Campbell has spoken and written extensively on this perhaps encapsulated most in his idea of “following your bliss”. It’s also known in a number of traditions as “following a path with heart”.
Living Life For Play is about not just the physical act of sex but having that power in your everyday life. It’s a natural charge, a higher level of energy than I see most people having. It's much more common to see it when people are in love - because they are releasing all those good chemicals in their bodymind.
But you can access and generate those chemicals before you get into being in love with someone else - it’s what makes you attractive, that you are giving off those signals, both non-verbally and biochemically. These are the components of Natural Charisma™ - and things you can generate intentionally.
Sexual Intelligence is not in your head it’s in your body and for many people their body is their unconscious mind - but when you learn to get back in touch with how you use your mindbody and bodymind you don’t just have better sex you actually get to have sex with someone who wants to have sex with you.