Some people have learnt to make life hard for themselves - it’s like they are constantly walking uphill. One of the things I work with clients on is Ontological Inclination™ - imagine you are standing on a slope, it's always easier to walk down hill isn't it. This would be following your natural ontological inclination, being in alignment with who you naturally are. But we don't always do this do we?
Some people just don't see certain options that are available to them - it's like those options literally do not exist. And it's not a matter of just learning to think differently because you know fundamentally certain things are not possible for you. And to a lesser extent other things are harder for you to do, more work for you to do. Where as others find those things easy to do. This should all be very obvious and natural - people are different so have different skills and abilities.
But how you've wired your brain, as we were speaking about last time isn't fixed. Neurogenesis is the process of rewiring your brain by what you think. As I've written elsewhere: Your mind creates your brain which creates your mind. Ontological Inclination is the tendency for what comes naturally, easily and effortlessly when you align with it rather than against it.
Or said very simply do you spend most of you time easily walking downhill or most of your time struggling up hill?
When you align with the Ontological Inclination of when your life works for you, you can begin to build a generative spiral of success leading to more success. Rather than the degenerative spiral that so many people get caught in of failure leading to more failure.
But that doesn't mean life is always easy sailing on calm waters - that's not reality. Real life has ups and downs and sometimes you may feel swamped and like you are about to go down with everything lost.
Power comes from knowing who you are and what you do - what your ontological inclination is. You need to be able to separate the data that is coming in from that data that YOU are generating. What you feel, what you think and being able to make the distinctions between what is happening "out there" and what you are generating "in here" is the key to being able to act effectively and get results.
It's the difference between the pilot who can land the plane in an emergency when everything is going wrong around him or her and the pilot who doesn't see what they are about to crash into until it is too late.
Power is when you know your ontological inclination and you recognise what you are about to do is possible. You could say the climb isn't too steep that your angle of approach is achievable, you have the felt sense that you know it is going to work.
Fear is when the angle is too steep - you feel like you will fall or your angle of approach is such that you will crash and burn. You literally feel like you are going to die.
It is emphatically NOT feel the fear and do it anyway - that is stupidity. That is overriding the information coming in, usually overthinking and ignoring or being unable to see the critical data.
Why this is such a bad idea is it leads you further off course.
You go OK I can tolerate a certain amount of fear and get so far I just need to build up my tolerance then I can get further...
People who do this are building a path of suffering for themselves. Literally a path of self inflicted torture.
Fear is information for you to take notice of and do something with.
It is also not False Evidence Appearing Real - which may be a comforting idea. It's also a misleading and potentially fatal one.
Fear is from the perspective of ontological inclination telling you that you need to adjust your angle of approach.
In other words stop how you are approaching and adjust.
This doesn't have to mean you stop completely - the more you work with the idea of ontological inclination the more you can build the flexibility to notice for when your angle of approach is wrong and correct.
The better you get the sooner you notice so the sooner you can respond and correct.
Technically your angle of approach is your "attitude" your orientation to success or failure.
So ontological inclination is how you naturally are. Your attitude (your angle of approach) is how you move towards success or away from it.
And because you know where you are starting from (ontological inclination) you can adjust your attitude based on actual data not made up data.
So this all sounds very intellectual but the practiced reality is it's exactly not that.
The key is attitude is a somatic process like surfing and you need to be able to keep your balance.
And you keep your balance or get it in the first place by understanding the Feeling Thinking Loop™ which we'll talk about next time.