I had a client asking me about “The Kiss Test” which is something David DeAngelo originated as a way to know when a woman wants to be kissed. What it is actually asking you to do is pay attention to her non-verbal communication. Remember that 93% I keep writing about - this is the reality that you need to be paying attention to that David DeAngelo was talking about way back when.
Most guys who are successful with women know that when it’s on it’s on - you know she wants to have sex with you and she knows you want to have sex with her and there’s nothing to say and actually saying stuff when you’re here is when you fuck it up rather than get to fuck.
This is why non-verbal communication is so important - REMEMBER it is the 93%
But the mistake people make is they want to turn it into a paint by numbers simple for a moron to understand test (sorry David but it’s true). When the whole point is to be paying attention to what she is really saying. It’s becoming aware of how she responds as a woman to you as a man. And this is going on all the time in your interaction with her and her interaction with you. So are you noticing for it? Because if you are not you are not going to be in that relationship for very long...
The ability to be good non-verbally is about “congruence” what you say with words matches what you say with that other 93%. This is driven by your own authenticity, and in may ways the more simple you make it the less you confuse yourself and so the less incongruent signals you send. It’s when you are literally thinking too much that you can’t see the responses she is making and respond to them in an appropriate way, because your thinking is what you are responding to not her responses.
So there was lot in that last paragraph, it’s worth reading again. It’s literally the success secret that will get you into bed with women or man you want rather than going home alone.
Most of the guys and girls I work with are paying so much attention to themselves that they literally aren’t noticing what their potential lover is “saying” to them.
The question I get asked all the time is “What do I do?” from the guy or girl who is attracted to their potential lover. What you do is really simple, you pay attention to your partner NOT to what you are thinking about them. And some people find this easy to do, others find it much much harder to do, and some people find it so hard to do particularly us introverts because we are so good at thinking about ourselves, and we’ve built the reflex or the muscle you could say to default to our thinking minds.
The answer for us is to just not think.
To let the mind rest.
And be mindfully present.
Which doesn’t mean a mind full of chaotic thought, but a mind calm like the ocean on a beautiful day when the wind is at rest and no waves break the mirror like surface of our consciousness.
And you don’t need to meditate for a thousand years to get here it’s about shifting your focus to your body because when you calm yourself here you also calm your mind and you can actually be present enough to be aware that there is a beautiful woman or man in front of you and when you have quieted yourself you are able to hear what they are saying with the words they use and see what they are saying with their body. AND OF COURSE they feel this. One of the most attractive things is to have someone be paying full attention to you, to be absorbed in and by you. To be captivated by you.
And at minimum you’ll get a smile :-)