If you are a bit different and are looking for the place where you can finally get the results you want you’ve found it.
If you’ve tried lots of different things and it hasn’t worked I can help you. While I’m unlikely to be sufficiently trendy or exciting to be your first choice. I am the option to choose when you’ve finally decided you’ve got to get serious, that the “quick fixes” don’t last and if you want to get the results you want you need to do real inner work on yourself.
- Do you want to be in an intimate relationship and can’t make that work? I can help you if you are serious about finding a relationship that works for you rather than doing pick-up or seduction techniques.
- Have you been successful in your career or business but don’t love what you do any more? The mythologist Joseph Campbell said: "People climb the ladder of success only to find they’ve placed it against the wrong wall." If you are stuck up the ladder where other people think you should be happy but in reality you hate your life I can help you find the way to living a life you love.
- Are you trying to start your own business but can’t quite get it to the level of success that you want? You don’t need to get more clients and customers, you need to get the right clients and customers. I can help you with the strategy to make your marketing and sales actually work.
I’ve worked with clients who had paid $10,000 and more for each session with "world renowned” therapists/teachers/marketers/experts and helped them the results that the big names couldn’t get.
I’ve trained with some of the leading therapists, trainers and marketers in the world. I apprenticed myself to and mentored with Transformational Performance consultant Dr. Joseph Riggio for nearly 20 years. I deeply understand the value of working on personal mastery and the 10,000 hours of intentional deliberate practice that go into building real skills.
I grew up surrounded by people who were a little bit different - as a boy between the ages of 8 to 12 I was a volunteer in a charity that looked after what were called at that time mentally and physically retarded children.
This wasn't through any virtue of my own, my mother worked for the business owner who was the organiser and main financial backer of the charity. So it was more of a convenient place to put me while she was working at weekends and at school holidays.
I was big for my age so useful in helping people into and out of their wheelchairs and in the general fetch and carry role.
So for me growing up it was very normal to be around people that most other people thought had problems so big and so terrible that they must be suffering beyond the “normal persons" ability to comprehend.
But while there was pain and suffering there was also joy and happiness and also more than anything a great deal of normal everyday life. Except it was normal to be in a wheelchair or normal not to have hands or legs. Or to look very different and be seen as a something rather than a someone.
A lot of the trips I helped out on were going somewhere where their happened to be a celebrity. So if we went to see a show, we also got to meet the cast or the famous people out of that cast.
As the “fetch and carry” person I was really part of the scenery rather than actually taking part. I was part of the “crew”, the “team” that made the event happen. So being “behind the scenes” I got to see the celebrities get ready and put their performance face on to get and greet and have photos taken with people.
I really didn’t think that much about this other than being too embarrassed to talk about this to my friends at school who got to hang out with “normal” people.
After I’d left school I was doing audio-visual work. At that time in the early 1980’s video equipment was very new. So I was doing the technical stuff for events like music performances and fashion shows and doing all the technical roles for TV and video productions - sound, lighting, photographic work, video work, editing and post production.
So I was again behind the scenes helping people to look good in front of the camera or on stage.
I found it really interesting being on stage, or at least behind the scenes being on stage. I’d developed my own disability, I stuttered severely and just couldn’t say certain words. It was so bad I had to plan out in my head what words to use before I said them so I could choose the words I could actually have a chance at saying. Yet I found it exciting to speak into the microphone and hear myself through the PA system even if I was just saying: “Testing 1, 2, 3…"
I tried speech therapy which seemed a bit pointless, but group speech therapy was more interesting because I met other people who couldn't talk.
I also did a group speech therapy improv class - looking back the idea seems insane. Take people who can’t talk and put them in an acting class where there is no script but you are put on the spot and have to find something relevant to say...
About ten years later I was doing a NLP Trainers Training. I’d grown in confidence and stuttered less but always in front of groups. I’d gone from a deep exploration of Buddhism and Buddhist psychology to starting a degree in Psychology with the Open University to NLP and had done a NLP Practitioner and NLP Master Practitioner trainings with Richard Bandler.
During the NLP Trainers Training I had a moment of enlightenment.
I was absolutely the worst speaker in what was a public speaking training.
I got on stage and died repeatedly. I just stuttered and stammered and forgot what I had so carefully planned to say. All the skills I had learned in my NLP Practitioner and Master Practitioner training went out of my head.
I was the guy who obviously shouldn’t have been there.
I was the guy people were trying to be nice to, trying not to laugh at, trying not to pity.
Yet looking back I’d grown up with people who were REALLY different, people who had REAL problems. And while I was deeply unhappy, deeply miserable because I just couldn’t talk to people I’d had the gift of being with people who no matter what extraordinary problems they'd had. They’d found happiness in the joy of being alive.
In studying Buddhism I’d had some of the same experience - how come these monks and nuns are so happy? I’d been to see The Dalai Lama and Thich Nhat Hanh and read counties books and listened to endless audio tapes. But in watching the people around these luminary teachers it was evident that they had found something - they were happy.
So the NLP Trainers Training was coming to an end and I’m on stage dying yet again. I somehow had the resilience - courage isn’t the right word, I didn’t know what I was doing I was just getting back up again and going and dying again on stage.
Yet in the middle of that dying where I’d forgotten what I’d planned to say. I kind of just gave up and stopped and in that moment woke up from the habitual patterned process I was stuck in and spoke to the experience we were mutually sharing - rather than trying to recite my carefully planned script, I just honestly spoke about what I was feeling, and just had a conversation with the audience. I don’t remember a word of what I said but I do remember that intimacy that moment of enlightenment and also a Homer Simpson style “DOH!!” moment - I realised something that should have been really really obvious. That the more you authentically speak your truth then other people feel that and relate to their own truth through that.
I’d stopped trying to be the performer on stage looking to try to be something special and instead through being honest, authentic and real had found a natural charisma that the audience related to.
But while I had a sense of what was important to me I didn’t have the skills to explain or work with other people around this idea.
So I found amidst training with the majority of international quality NLP and Hypnosis teachers real gems, real authentic people, like NLP Trainer Jonathan Altfeld who is as fun and naturally skilled in the pub after the training as in the training.
Stephen Gilligan, one of Milton Ericsson’s students who I got to hang out at his Aikido dojo with, and who continues to evolve and develop his understanding of trance, a truly world class trainer.
Phil Young and Morag Campbell of Masterworks International genuinely extraordinary spiritually normal people who teach Polarity Therapy and Huna.
And Joseph Riggio the creator of the MythoSelf process, an absolute genius who is constantly evolving and developing new transformational work.
And I still find I really identify with and appreciate people who are a bit different. And the more you value this difference the more success you find, success that is a fit and match for who you really are.
Too often the social algorithm - that we are fundamentally tribal people and react behaviourally in a programmed way following a set of rules. Limits us to what we think other people want us to do rather than what we really want for ourselves.
And it’s by exploring our difference and valuing it we find ways that work for us.
Joseph Campbell said: “The privilege of a lifetime is being who you are”.
You need to start to become the author of your story, the director of the movie where you are the star, the voice that stands out from the background noise.
This is the path of the warrior.
Because the real war is always within yourself.
And you need someone on your side to help you win.
This is my mission to help you be the difference that can make a difference. The world needs people like you who will step up into a position of leadership in their own lives.
We change the world by changing ourselves.